cracker ass crackers

so I'm chilling at the tennis courts, letting the dogs run down their too-long claws when the high school kids get out.

as mandated by the uber-wealthy suburban code, the range rovers, lexuses and large toyota SUV's start flying by...inexperienced teenagers at the helms, playing shitty music too loudly, and ignoring stop signs.

then...something (really) funny happened. a volkswagen full o' white kids was driving around the neighborhood screaming "NIGGER!!!" at equally white kids on their way home to million dollar houses.

I laughed. I peed. I had to start walking home to change my drawers.

it was a good thing that I was already on my way home, cause I piddled again when I saw the archetypal thick necked, square headed jock kid, driving a spiffed up standard issue, country-boy mustange at a stop sign...

listening to gospel.

the emo kids talking about skate boarding and the two puerto rican boys talking about what gats they wanna get were annoying....but at least they made sense.

I haul my overly large ass up the hill to find my daughter and 3 of her friends (all eating MY fruit) standing at the corner in skinny jeans.

now, to my kid's credit...she probably belongs to the only trully heterogeneous group in the district. there were two skinny girls. two white girls. two black girls. two chubby chics. short hair, long hair, different styles, different lilts to their voices ("like....OH MY GOD!!" and "how yoooou doing?")

but, ladies. ladies, ladies, ladies...

come on.

skinny jeans???

wtf.