where my witches is at?

today is the summer solstice.

...which means last night was the witching night. (eye of newt. wing of sparrow)

its a tradition with the women in my family to convene on the solstice, eat plentifully (ow), drink up all the liquor we can find (double ow), make fire and commune with the universe. last night...

we initiated the youngings. there were more "virgin" margaritas, coladas and daquiries floating about last night than denim skirts and jelly bracelets at a roller rink (am I the only one REALLY upset that the 80's are back? I mean, come on...the fashion, music and hair all sucked the first time around and I don't know 'bout you...but I am WAAAAY too young to have seen that shit return just yet. where was I...oh, the spiderwebs).

the girls (11 and 12) were told that they were not children last night...but fellow women, full members of our little society and would be treated accordingly.

ha. fricking. ha! that lasted all of seventeen minutes, due to the little dorks gorging themselves on fruit roll-ups and juice boxes. while I'm all for encouraging independence...I KNEW...

if one of them hurled. grown, self-assured women, my ass...I was cleaning it up.

once we got their eating under control (only b/c my mother just started sneaking it to them on the sly) we got our witching underway. I collected a spider's web and caught its inhabitant in a matchbox...mostly to freak the kids out (heheheh I'm evil).

they were all "wha....wha...what are we gonna do with that???" then I showed them the cauldron.

again with the evil auntie suki.

we made up for my torturous teasing by allowing them each the use of words "damn it" all evening. my holy god was my kid hilarious! I cuss like a sailor on leave, but my child will find her death at the end of a four-letter word. but since grammy gave the ok on the d-bomb...the kid was marching her narrow azz around all night lending more than her fair share of psuedo-profanity to the event. I had to bite my tongue more than on(c)e (hundred times) to keep from giving her a tongue lashing. howev...I was in the spirit and rolled with the punches (and rum).

our actual goal for the evening (besides instruction in the proper use of profanity) was to bring about communication and clue them in to their real powers. my mother taught them how to build a fire, we all wrote our wishes/prayers/concerns/thanks/requests to the universe and burned them cathartically (my kid, surreptitiously, threw one in that said "DAAAAMN IT! that felt good").

then we sat around talking about our gifts and powers. the kid, we've determined is socially gifted. she's like an equalizer for all situations. her calm puts people at east. the niece, we've decided, is gifted with great attitude and awesome perspective. things roll off her back that would have me angry-blogging for hours. my mother, the whackjob, still talks to dead people...

and I...read minds.


in fact, I know what you're thinking RIGHT now...

you're thinking I'm retarded.