cooling off

I'd like to give a shout out to 70 degree weather, hoodies, long pants and chilly nights.

thank ya, jesus!!! fall doth come(th).

speaking of jesus...oqui and I have been batting around the idea of adding a little faith to our lives. we've recently come to the long overdue conclusion that we're cranky, kermudgeon, rat-fink bastards and prolly need to change our outlook(s) a bit.

enter the jesus peeps. these motherfuckers are always so goddamn (no offense to my jesus peeps) fucking happy.

happy. happy. disgustingly, sickeningly happy.

I want in.

problem is...neither one of us even remotely believes in jesus. in fact, oqui is openly antagonistic about the concept and I'm afeared that should he set foot in a place of worship, he'd instantly combust.

I, myself, am mostly agnostic with a heavy side of atheism. I TRIED to believe. trust in suki...there was a time in my life in which I actively sought faith. I went to mosques, chapels, mass, temples...

I even went so far as to join a rite of christian initiation for adult's class (not just for the tuition discount at catholic school, either) during which I told a little ol' nun that I prayed for faith. BEGGED for belief. asked for the faith of Job (you know, the guy who kept get his ass handed to him by god but refused to denouce him)....

and nothing. I asked the lil' ol' nun...how can that be? doth not god hear and answer our prayers.

she resorted to honesty with me. she started with, "I don't know" and followed up with the advice that if I really wanted to believe...I had to stop trying to do so intellectually and just take the leap.

she was sweet. she also told me that she didn't believe every word in the catechism (ie. that unbaptised babies go to hell) and that you have to pick and choose your religious battles...

which led me to the muslims.

islam is a great way to become a die-hard, complete and total hypocrite. the scriptual expectations are set so incredibly high that noone (NOONE) can live up to them...and thusly get very good at rationalizing their transgressions.

the catholics, are also good at this from what I hear.

so, oqui and I are half seriously considering heading to church for at least the social benefits...all the while keeping eyes peeled for a non-religious alternative. (from what I remember of my preacher's kid days...church goers aren't always the happy mofos they appear to be. has something changed since I last dared to do the wafer?)

I suppose if we go to church, get strung up for being blasphemous interlopers and have nowhere else to turn...

we can always try yoga, or find a good drug dealer.