divorce

I'm sitting here just minding my own business (read: trolling for tranny porn. I mean...COME ON who doesn't enjoy a little meatspin?) when I hear the hub start to tinkle.

then I hear him continuing to tinkle.

and he's going...

and going...and three minutes later I figure I better go check to make sure he's not bleeding out or something else bathroom related and rather sinister...

only to find him in a no-hands pee stance BRUSHING HIS TEETH.

so I'm filing for divorce first thing monday morning. I'll be accepting applications for a new husband starting...

now.

all applicants must be in good health, extraordinarily patient every fourth week, and sign the following waiver.


I (insert name),

hereby acknowledge that by submitting my application for husband du jour I am hereby waiving any and all rights, personal property and much beloved freedoms. I am also acknowledging that Teh Suki will not be required to complete more than one of the following tasks on any given day:

1. cooking
2. cleaning
3. work
4. givin' up da 'nonni

upon submission of my application I forfeit my right to further manhood...

and agree to buy the JUMBO box of tampons.

x_________________